Scum are everywhere. Agreeing with Twenty.

Twenty Major on the problems with kids today.

They shoplifted, they drank cider, they smoked John Player blue, they wore pants too short from them and those squiggly jumpers you used to see in Dunnes Stores and they got up to no good. They sniffed glue and generally made a nuisance of themselves rather than being a serious threat. And remember, none of these lads had much to do. It was a time of four channel (if you were lucky) TV and days and nights spent out of the house because going out was all there was to do.

Kids today do have it easy. I am a grumpy old sod but I wasn’t allowed to monopolise the TV with my videogames (and yes, I had an Atari 2600), I didn’t get a computer until I was 11 (and yes, I was one of the lucky ones) and I got more than one lecture about spending too much time in my room. If I threw a tantrum, you can be pretty sure I’d have my butt tanned.

I’ve seen screaming tantrums from children (my own, others) because they were told to turn the TV off or because we’ve arrived at some childrens entertainment venue and they’re closed for lunch. My daughter has a whining moan noise when she doesn’t get her way but that can usually be cured by telling her to stop making that noise. My son can be boisterous and violent but he’s a young lad, there’s no actual malice in there. Compare this to others: I spotted some little gobshite entreating other kids to kick a cat outside a school while his parents watched. In Tesco, I saw a kid who must have been 10 years old punch his mother in the face because she said No. On the Lisburn road, two young lads walked down the road and picked fruit from the front of a greengrocer and walked on. The grocer ran out and the two, in broad daylight, challenged him. What could he do? Him against two young aggressive lads? By the time the rozzers got there they’d be long gone.

Now I understand that Twenty Major is a comedy satire. But there’s realism in them comedies. So buy the book but don’t read it until you know where your kids are.